Wowser!

I am completely discombobulated for no really obvious reason on its own, but just as a combination of small ingredients that all have added up to what has been my perfect rush by day that has not ended yet. Somehow I have to get back to earth and calm my brain down and be a mellow woman who is soothed back into a quiet place.

I guess the thing that really disturbed me the most today is, that my sister told me that my niece’s English teacher is an ‘America basher’ and a ‘conspiracy theorist’ and he is taking the opportunity to tell his students all the familiar theories about there not really having been any men on the moon, and that the government was behind 9/11 and placed dynamite in the World Trade Center towers and that there are UFO’s in Area 49. Basically he is starting them down the path of everything conspiracy theorists believe in and we think this is just the beginning.The children have to make their homework about these subjects.

My sister and I are outraged about this and are planning a course of action, which involves going to the head of the school to make an official complaint and stating that the man is unqualified to teach impressionable teenagers. None of the other parents seem to see the danger and some of the children are already becoming persuaded by his arguments.

If I were a dragon, I would be spewing fire from my nostrils just now. His partner teaches English at that school also and tells the kids that American English is just a bastardized form of proper English, which the children learn to speak, they speak Oxford English and American English is frowned upon quite heavily.

I do not like people like this and think they are dangerous to have around children. That’s all I’ll say about it. Bah humbug!

This morning I went to my creative therapy class and managed to finish my collages. Some of them took as many as 7 color washes before I was happy with them. I got the hang of it after a while, getting the right thinness of paint, getting it almost opaque. I am quite pleased with the outcome and now that I sort of know what I am doing, I am ready for the next project, which will probably be a painting, but maybe a mixed media collage. I have to think about it long and hard. I’ll have to put my thinking cap on. I like the effect of the scraped away images and people commented on them the most, besides the text, of course.

My sister kept complaining that the Überhund smelled bad, so today we took him to the doggy trimster where he got a cut and a bath and he looks splendid, but when we got him back in the car, my sister said that he still smelled bad and I thought that it could only be his breath then, but he had his teeth cleaned in March. I don’t smell it, of course, because I am around him all the time. So, this evening I took him to the vet and the vet had a look at his teeth and said there was enough plaque build up there for a year, therefor his bad breath. He figures it was because of his old dog food that was too soft for him to eat, and I very proudly told him that I just switched brands and that this kind should be better. It’s harder to chew.

So, on Wednesday at 2 PM the Überhund is going in to have his teeth cleaned again. I also got him another 2 months worth of pills for his osteoarthritis which is helping him so much.

In between everything, I tried to bring some order to the apartment, but I did not get a lot done. I had palnned to buy a new shower curtain, but couldn’t find one quick enough when I was at the department store the other day, so I decided to wash the one I had in the washing machine and much to my amazement, it came out looking brand spanking new, so that problem is solved. The bathroom is tiled halfway up allaround and to the top where the shower is and I need to scrub the tiles really well, so that’s another job waiting for me. I do love it so much.

I have decided to be brave and weed the flower beds and in between the tiles to make the patio a little bit more attractive and to cut back the jasmine which is taking over everything. I’ll make some room for that strange bush that is growing there. My sister is convinced that I can make it an attractive place to sit and commune with nature. We’ll see.

The Überhund is giving me those looks again of, “I want you to take me out now,” So I suppose that’s wat I’ll do now. Did I tell you that I sort have my eye on our vet in a very innocent way. I think he is married, but I always make sure I look good when I go there. I like to flabbergast him.

Ciao…

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You’re at the right place.

Feeling frustration in real life, i felt I had to do something in my other life, my blogging life, and just for awhile I am going to try this design on and not have any naked ladies hang around the place. Sometimes it feels so good to make a change and it sort of lifts my spirit, but you will all have to let me know how this works for you. That may or may not influence me. I’ll see.

The wonderful news is, that the tax people just called and that they made a decision in my favor and that as of July the first I will have housing and medical care subsidies, so I have some money coming in. There was no problem at all and I could have reached over the phone and given that woman a hard hug. I had been so worried. So, something is going right today. On top of that, my older sister sent me some money which is enough to go to Ikea with to buy a rug for by the sofa to cover up two cigarette burns in the linoleum. My younger sister and I will do that tomorrow.

So, you see I do have some things going right for me too. Thank goodness for that. I will somehow remain eternally optimistic, as long as Visa comes through with the money, which I think they will. I have had a computer generated confirmation as to my request, so I assume all is well. At least after this phone call from the tax people, my stomach is not in knots anymore.

I got up rather early this morning and after piddling around behind the PC for awhile, i decided that I wasn’t properly awake yet and went back to bed, where i very promptly fell asleep and slept until 10AM, which was super, but after that, it was hard to get the day going, feeling like languishing in my pajamas and not walking the dog, whom I let piddle out back.

I drank coffee and smoked cigarettes and hung out on Facebook and generally wasted my time. Sometimes it is nice to be a lady of leisure, or pretend to be one. Jesker was very mellow about the whole thing and there was not a peep out of him. Sometimes he can be very demanding about wanting to go out, but at times he seems oblivious and just plops down and goes to sleep as if he knows I’m not in the proper mood.

I’ve done some housework, so I haven’t quite wasted the day and the apartment looks clean enough if you wear roller skates and roll through it really fast. There is always something undone and some area that needs my attention, but then I am not a stickler for details and I easily let things slide as long as it looks halfway decent. I do notice that everything stays cleaner now that I live here on my own. No dust devil here with motor grease.

What really amuses me is how little TV I watch. I really have to make the effort to turn it on and I don’t have a TV guide, so I very seldom know what’s going to be on, I only find out by chance. I try to watch the news, but very often even that slides by me and I miss what’s going on in the world and am a badly informed citizen. Do you think that can be held against me? Such irresponsibility. Neither do I read a newspaper, although I could easily read the BBC News on line. I think I’ve become to self centered in my little busy world.

The kids are back in school and every morning troves of them walk by the apartment with their parents. Kids of all nationalities. it is a regular melting pot an it gives me pleasure to see it. Some of the women wear head scarves and some of the black women wear reggae colors. They are all very colorful. The kids jabber in all sorts of languages plus Dutch. They all stop to look at the cats that sit in the windows. Nouri gets scared and runs away, but Toby and Gandhi stay put. They understand the protection of glass.

Jesker thinks he has to bark at everybody who looks in and thinks he is a great protector of all of us. he doesn’t understand why i don’t get upset and just sit there.

Some art:

I have a limp cigarette that’s being puled down by gravity when I try to take a drag off it. I guess it is a dud. You do get those sometimes. It’s real tricky to make good cigarettes, you have to get just the right amount of tobacco in.

Well, my dog wants to go out now and no amount of telling him to be patient is making a difference, so off we must go. I will put my walking shoes on and my jacket and put lots of baggies in my pocket.

Have a great day. I am planning on relaxing as much as possible the rest of the day, having no stomach tied in knots now.

Ciao…

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What the hell?

Because I had to live on a teeny little welfare check for two months, that was not even enough to buy groceries with, Eduard supported me financially the best way he could by also borrowing money and making ends meet. Because of this, Social Services sees this money as income and is therefor not giving me my regular welfare check for this month. As a matter of fact, I am getting no money at all. So, until September the 20th, I will have to live on the money I borrow from my Visa card, because money borrowed is not considered income, because you can show that you are having to pay it back. I can not receive money from anybody else, as that will be considered income and will be withdrawn from my welfare payment. I can submit an objection, but it is all going to take precious time and in the meantime I am going to be very poor and owing a lot of money.

Still, after the initial shock of it, I decided to put on my happy face and consider myself lucky that I even have a credit card with enough credit left on it that I can borrow the money from. I would have to go through all sorts of lengths to get money otherwise and frankly, I would not know how, except for hanging a red light in the window. So, I’m trying to look at it cheerfully.

The man who is handling my case at Social Services now is new and he thought that the money I had received from Eduard was an alimony payment and that I would get that much money all the time. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry and I told him that I was sorry, but that I had to pull myself together and that I would call him back shortly. I did have to pull myself together emotionally and I don’t like to do that while on the phone with a well meaning, but complete stranger.

This also explains why the tax people, who decide about my rent and medical care subsidies, told me they would call me back later this week between 1 and 3 PM. They are probably also assuming that I received a large amount of money in alimony payments and will forever. I sure do have some straightening out to do.

Anyway, this bright and happy news did set the tone for the rest of my day, even though I did not want it to, but I couldn’t help but be affected by it. The best thing to do is put on my brave trooper face and act like the whole damn thing is not going to get me down and it won’t in the end. I just hate bureaucracy and the stiff unbending rules that make it work against the little honest people. Eduard and I should have lied our heads off or have made different arrangements, but c’est la vie.

In the meantime, life at the Pondorosa continues with all the regular things that take place, although today was a little bit off. I did walk Jesker four times, but we didn’t make a long walk once, because he gets out of breath so quickly. He pants for a long time when we get back. I have been noticing that this summer. It’s not the heat, because it hasn’t been warm here at all for quite awhile.

I am having fun with Facebook, because this time it is I who picks out who I want to be friends with and I have a eclectic set of rules that only I understand. It comes down to instinct basically, guided by some very basic standards. I manage okay that way and have made some new friends. I even got Eduard to join, which is a miracle of itself.

Tomorrow I have wonderful ergo therapy and we will discuss detachment. I feel I have to crawl into my shell when I get bitterly disappointed, but maybe the thing is to seek your solace amongst people and their healing presence. At least I assume their presence can be healing. I am Irene the Brave, master of all my emotions. Right!

Eduard was here this afternoon, because his mobile phone is in my name and we thought his subscription had to be renewed and the person who owns the phone has to do that. It turned out that the subscription didn’t need to be renewed, it does it of itself, so that was a waste of time, even though they told us last year that we would have to do this. I had my passport and client number all ready for it too. Good intentions all the way down the line.

I am especially looking forward to going to bed tonight, even though so far I am postponing it, but it does mean an end to this rather disappointing day. At the same time, I don’t want to go to bed with even the slightest defeated feeling, so I am staying up until that is completely gone.

Jesker is snoring beside me after he has been very good about letting me put his eye drops in.

The differences between the cats and the dog are really so large. The dog is so dependent on me and the cats are hardly at all. Well, yes they are for their food and water and milk and they let me know very loudly when they’ve run out, but other than that, they are independent creatures that make up their own mind about when they come and go and when they need attention and how much they want. I am much more like a cat that way, because I like my independence too and I hate to be shackled to a time and a place and a person. I would hate to be a dog and I would probably bite my owner in his bum out of frustration. Maybe that’s why I am always so overly nice and patient with Jesker, because I would hate to be him and be dependent on a human being. I try to be an understanding human being for Jesker. I felt the same way when my kids were little and they were dependent on me.

I swept the apartment with a broom and a brush and dustpan this afternoon, because i thought the tax people might call me and I don’t hear the phone when I have the vacuum cleaner running. It worked equally well and you would be amazed by how much sand and hair I swept up. Actually, it was a meditative sort of job and kind of pleasant to do and I may do it again. The drawback is that I don’t vacuum the sofa and chairs then, so I will have to do that another time or wave my magic wand and have them turn out perfectly clean that way. Ha, I wish.

Well, I’ll end this epistle and go and do some other things until I am good and ready for bed. I could go on forever, but I don’t want to bore you with every tiny detail of my life, fascinating as it all may be.

See you all tomorrow, sleep tight.

Ciao…

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Well, shoot me then!

Darn, I haven’t done a damn thing all day. At least not any of the things that come under the heading of ‘household chores’. Everything is exactly as it was this morning when I got up, not one speck of dirt and not one dirty dish has been moved. Not that I have that many specks of dirt and dirty dishes, living here on my own and all that. I do have dog hair, however and I could have, I say, I could have, vacuumed today, but since the day is sacred, I thought I would not noisy it up with the sound of the vacuum cleaner. How is that for a fair set of reasoning? I am not even a religious person when I am in my right mind, yet I abide by the holiness of Sunday and always will.

Well, I did walk the dog numerous times and the first time was at 4AM, because he had to go badly and you don’t say it’s too early to a dog who has to go badly. I have fed him and the cats and given him his pills and his eye drops, so I have been a responsible owner, even if it is my day off. I have to walk him once more tonight and do his eye twice more and then we call it a day.

Remember when I was being all sentimental and so convinced that I should have a second dog and that I had to be talked out of that by my sister and my daughter and some other people? Well, these past few days the thought has been growing with me that after the Überhund is gone I may not want another dog at all, but just stick with cats. It would give me a lot more freedom to come and go as i choose and to spend nights away from home and make short trips. Now I am always rushing home at certain times of the day to walk him and sometimes I want to linger somewhere when there is a good atmosphere and a good conversation going.

So, I am going to put some deep thought into that. It is a whole new idea that I have to approach with a whole new attitude.

Well, what did I do all day? I hung out behind the computer doing all sorts of things on Facebook and on my new email address and on a new web group I joined. I frankly piddled the whole day away doing piddly things that don’t justify all the time I spent on them. Oh yes, I updated my profile on Hyves too, but that is no fun for you people because it is all in Dutch. Besides, I don’t move under my real name there, I am incognito.

I’ll tel you what I did on Facebook. I looked through the pictures of all the friends of my friends and when I saw a nice looking man, I wrote him a really nice message and asked him to be my friend. I only did it three times, so I was being very picky and they all live far away, so there is no danger of anything developing. Wasn’t that smart of me? I don’t know. It probably is going to backfire on me or something…

I just ate a bowl of asparagus soup and it is making me feel very sad. Does eating asparagus make you feel sad? Why would that be? Am I associating something with asparagus? I always think that the big ones look like circumcised penises, but that can’t be it. I have that sometimes with some foods, that they make me feel sad and I never know why. It is a feeling that passes after a while and I used to think it was like an allergy, but now I think it is maybe an association deep down in my subconscious.

I tell you, so much happens in my subconscious that steers me, that I am not aware of, sometimes I wonder if I have a free will at all.

It’s only just after 6 o’clock and I am already yawning. I can’t possibly be sleepy now. The Überhund is sleeping at my feet and snoring, maybe that is sleep inducing.

I tell you what. I am going to keep this short for tonight and watch some TV. The Netherlands are managing to win a medal about every day so we’ll see how they did today. That is, if I can keep my eyes open.

Have a happy what’s left of this Sunday. I’m not complaining about mine.

Ciao…

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Aaarrrggghhh!

I just finished filling up the fourth and last 1 GB MP3 player and I tell you, it looks like such an easy little job that you’ll just do in your spare little hours between everything else. Well, it is not. It takes hours to find the right music and fill those suckers up and, of course, once you start, you can’t stop. At least I can’t, because I am so obsessive. I want it done and I want to listen to it. Well, now I am and I still have the other three to listen to properly, but at least I know that I don’t have to do this anymore and that I can get back to my normal life. Jeez, get with the program, Irene!

I have neglected my housecleaning and my poor animals and I have not given them special belly rubs and talked to them all nicely and given them extra treats because they were being so good, I am a bad mother. I should be put in the hall of shame. The Uberhund was so patient with me. he looked at me longingly, but my eyes were fixed on the computer screen and my hand was attached to the mouse and I barely petted him.

Well, I guess it wasn’t all bad, I did take him for his walks and pick up his turds and dispose of them properly, and I did make a big deal out of him when I came home and he was waiting patiently by the door. You should hear the endearments I call him. You would be embarrassed for me. They’re hard to translate into English, Ha, that’s my excuse and that’s my story and i stick to it. Somebody has been commenting and telling me that a lot lately, but he is a mystery person to me. It’s probably John.

I went to creative therapy today and worked with clay. I attempted to make a woman’s head. It was very funny. I got the general shape right but she could have been an old croon or an old man. She had no upper lip. It was completely hidden away behind her extremely large nose. She also had very large nostrils. She had no forehead and very heavy eyebrow ridges, Sort of Neanderthal like. I did get her cheekbones right and her eyelids. I didn’t bother giving her ears. I figured that was too hard and I gave her hair instead.

The instructor came I sliced a good part of her nose of and remodeled it and then we could see her upper lid, which she turned out to have after all. It did improve her appearance a bit, but she still looks like an old croon. Maybe I am a character artist and I only do funny heads well, by accident.

I didn’t quit and made a new head avoiding all the mistakes I made in the first one. Now I made a woman who looks like Barbara Streisand, she has the nose and the heavy lidded eyes. At least she looks less like an old croon, but it isn’t art. So I give up on the clay and next week i will try something else again until I find my specialty. Which may be bookbinding or something like that. I am a pathetic student of the arts. I know what I like , but I can’t make it. Here I thought I was, and had the reputation of, being artistic. It’s all a damn lie, I tell you.

Well, luckily, it was finally time to go home and I hopped on my bike and when I was almost home, it started to rain like crazy, so I peddled like mad and got wet anyway.

My new second hand bed is going to be here on Thursday and I think the Exfactor is coming to get the double bed on Wednesday, so that means one night on the sofa, but it does give me a chance to clean up the bedroom really well. There are going to be huge dust bunnies under the double bed, I know that for sure and God only knows what other surprises. I do have three cats, after all. I just hope there is nothing dead underneath there. Like a petrified mouse. I found one once when I moved the bookcase.

I am making a new friend at the place where the therapy classes are held. There is a common room and veranda where everybody from all the classes have their breaks and I met someone I know from an earlier time in the hospital. We hit it of right away again and I think she and I will end up being friends again. We’re just testing the waters now. You have to when all of you come with an instruction booklet. You just take it nice and slow.

I said to everybody that I was getting a single bed on Thursday and that they knew what that meant for my future life as a single woman, didn’t they? They all had a good laugh about that.

It does mean a lot of room in the bedroom to roller skate in and do other activities that need a lot of room. Like playing croquet, for instance, or shuffleboard.

Well, now I am going to end this and sit down on my rear end on the sofa, because I have a sore butt from sitting in his computer chair. Oh yes, will somebody give me Kaycie’s proper website address? I think I am looking in the wrong place. Is she no longer living in the Bible belt?

Have a terrific day. Be artistic and spread your knowledge to us less gifted people. We poor souls.

Ciao…

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A dull day.

I am having a dull day and I am having it on purpose. I feel dull and dumb witted and I have decided not to exert myself at all and not do anything that requires great amounts of efforts, except for walking the Uberhund. I have lazed on the sofa, taking little cat naps, listening to my music, thinking insignificant thoughts, turning into a vegetable, an eggplant maybe, and letting the whole world pass in a parade and it feels good.

It’s so pleasant being lazy and dull and dumb witted. I haven’t even properly made up my face, though I have combed my hair and put on decent clothes. I know the queen isn’t coming by for tea today, so I don’t give a hoot. I’ve done the dishes and made the bed and cleaned up the living room, so we know a decent person lives here.

I sit here and yawn and think about the next nap and how lovely it is to drift off until the Uberhund nuzzles me with his nose to get me up. This morning I repeatedly hit the alarm clock until the snooze alarm stopped and went back to sleep until the Uberhund thought I had done enough of that and woke me up. He did have dire business to do due to that found bone.

It was already warm outside at 7 AM and we made a longish walk and when we got home, I realized I had forgotten to take the mail to the mailbox, so we went and did that too. We were fairly worn out after that and both took naps. In the interest of science, I am willing to find out how many naps a 53 year old woman can take on a lazy Saturday in early July, accompanied by her trusty four footer.

That bone put the Uberhund off his food for a while, but he just ate a bowl of Frolic, so I guess he is back to normal now. I wonder if he puts two and two together in his mind and associates eating the bone with not feeling so well? At least he had a terrific time yesterday gnawing on it and feeling like a ferocious ancestral being. I am still wondering if we stumbled upon the scene of a crime and it was part of a human thighbone? My imagination works overtime.

The cats are droopy like we all are. We are all just droopy. I called my sister and she was cleaning her house from top to bottom and I think there is something seriously wrong with her, because she sounded as if she was enjoying it. I had to call her about a grammatical question and since she is a trained elementary school teacher there is no better person to ask. I have forgotten so many of those Dutch rules. I always forget to ask her, because i forget she is smart and knows these things.

I have to forward the Exfactor’s mail to him now at his new address and I still have to look it up each time, but soon I will know it by heart. I can’t address it to that cute house with the climbing rose over the front door portico with the number 15 next to it and the nicely shaped bushes in the front garden.

I enjoy getting mail now, when it is addressed to me in my own name. Even bills I don’t mind and I am very organized. I have everything in binders in its own place.

My sister just came by to bring me this weekend’s paper. She thought I might enjoy reading it and I said, yes to add it to my stack of recycled paper that needs to be put to the curb. That’s on the 26th of July, I mustn’t forget that. That’s why I’ve got that no/no sticker on the mail slot, so I won’t get any of that extra paper junk in my mail box. The weekend paper is so large too!

The Uberhund was beside himself when he saw my sister and started howling at her with is head pointing at the ceiling. That was a real welcome! He is a kind dog that way. He does have his favorite people.

The Exfactor is coming on Wednesday afternoon to take all the boxes out of the workroom and hopefully he will take the bed at the same time too. If my new bed is not here, I will sleep on the sofa. It will give me a chance to clean up the bedroom really well. There must be several inches of dust under the bed that are hard to get too. Oh, I see why I need this lazy day now. It is to gather my strength for the week to come.

Yes, well, I just wanted it to be lazy. Just for the heck of it. I didn’t want it to have a purpose.

A day will come, real soon, when I least expect it, when I will be struck by the window wash genie. I can feel it coming, but it’s not quite there yet. I did buy a new bottle of Glassex the other day, maybe that is a coming sign of it. First the spit and polish and then the Glassex.

Well, now I am very droopily going to make me another mug of coffee and try to figure out a way to download some music, there must be a way to do it, bugger!

Have a very good day, droopy or not lazy or active, with or without naps.

Ciao…

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Unproductive to a point.

This was going to be a very productive day with me vacuuming and cleaning out the last kitchen cupboard, but somehow it isn’t turning out that sort of day at all. Instead, it is turning into a cozy day at home with the Uberhund and the cats, while outside it rains on and off and the world gets refreshed and very brightly green. I do like cozy days at home and since the day is only half way over yet, all things are possible and I may surprise myself and accomplish a big deed yet. We’ll see how the mood strikes me.

I do like this kind of weather. It makes me feel all safe and comfortable inside my little apartment and with just a few lights on it gives an atmosphere of real coziness. Dutch people are big on coziness, It is a stop word for us. We are always looking for it wherever we go.

I did just go and have a coffee with my sister where she practiced her signature in her maiden name and we had to find the nicest one. We finally settled on the best one that is also the most readable. She had changed her signature when she got married, where i had kept mine when I did, so I did not have that added problem. I gave her the book on how to get through a divorce for the first time that has many good tips in it. I hope it helps her a lot. They have the added complications of children and shared property, which the Exfactor and I didn’t have.

The Exfactor and the Paramount only see each other once every two weeks. Doesn’t sound like a very intense relationship, does it? He says that this is fine with him and I’ll have to take his word for it, but I wonder if he was not hoping for more. I think he might like a little bit more companionship than that. I don’t know why this was arranged this way, if it was to give her room with her other friends or if it is truly to give each other the space they need, but it is unconventional, considering he gave up his marriage for it.

He told me very proudly the other day, that he had not been reading my blog anymore and I said that that was good, because he would not have been able to anyway. I do appreciate him making the effort in not reading it anymore, but I still think it was better to remove the temptation all together and especially remove it out of the regions of the Paramount, crafty as she is. A woman does have a way to figure things out if she wants to badly enough. I’m a woman, I know these things.

I was once in a relationship with a man who was very dishonest emotionally. I learned to be very crafty and discover the truth about most things, but I did not enjoy playing that role of detective and being a subterfuge person. I developed a dislike for myself and my behavior, forced as I thought I was into it. It was all a very sick game we were playing and tearing myself lose from it was very painful, because dysfunctional behavior becomes addictive sometimes. Maybe the Paramount got a thrill out of the illegality of the relationship she had with the Exfactor. I hope for his sake that there is more than that. I wish for him to have romance and love in his life.

I, on the other hand, wish none of that for me. I wish for good friendships and good relationships with my sisters and my daughter. I wish for my mind to be equally clear and strong in the morning as it is at night when I go to bed. I want to continue to have these nice and relaxed relationships with the Uberhund and the minion cats, this harmonious togetherness.

Oh, by the way, the Uberkat and his sidekick the white cat are staying with me. In turn, the Exfactor is paying for my mobile phone. He wants them to stay in a place where they are happy and not subject them to a move and the stress that comes with it, not knowing where he is going to end up. it may be in an apartment 5 stories up.

Now it is true that the animals have been especially mellow since the Exfactor has been gone, so he does seem to have functioned as some sort of disturbing signal in the apartment. That is gone now and everybody is very relaxed. We have our routines and regular eating times and serenity and solitude and it all makes for quite living with some nice music in the background. I think the animals pick up on that.

So I don’t mind if the Uberkat and his white sidekick stay. They are no problem at all and I hardly notice any difference with one cat or three. Of course the one minion cat will always be the Uberhund’s favorite, but I am working on him accepting the other two more also and to not be so jealous of them. That’s why I have two hands to pet two animals with at the same time.

My sister was here briefly with her dog and he is not used to cats and is secretly afraid of them. He tries to hide this behind a certain amount of bravour and acting tougher than he is, but he is really afraid that they will jump up at him and bite him in the face. My cats don’t know this and find safe and high places to sit while he is here and glare at him with a lot of suspicion in their eyes. The dog sees their food dishes and thinks of only one thing, how to devour what is in them as quickly as possible. You know: Found food and all that. That dog has food on the brain.

The Uberhund has no sense of ownership when it comes to my sister’s dog and makes no effort to protect his territory. He doesn’t protect the cats or their food dishes.

Well. I typed a whole bunch of more stuff after this, but WordPress developed a problem and didn’t save it and swallowed my post. Luckily, it saved most of it as a draft, but then I had some trouble retrieving it. So I went off and did some other things, like vacuum the living room and the sofa and the chairs. I did accomplish something anyway and then there’s that one kitchen cupboard to clean yet.

Art, where’s the art? I don’t know, I am not artistic lately, I feel like a total dud when it comes to artistic endeavors and I need to be inspired by something grand. There are people out there doing some really good things, but I need to do something really good in real life in my creative therapy class. I have a vision of making a sculpture out of clay and I have the general shape in my head, but getting it done 3 dimensionally is something else all together, of course. I hope not to find out that I really am a total dud and not bake anything of it at all. I would hope to be exuberant, but I’m afraid I’ll just be uptight and narrow minded.

Alright, I have to read some blogs now. It’s a promise I made myself. I must do it. I’ve got an hour before I have to walk the Uberhund, so that gives me some time.

Ciao…

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Thunder.

The Uberhund is very upset because it is thundering and lightening and he doesn’t know what it means. He is barking at it something fiercely, because it is right above our heads and going very strong. I think he is a little bit scared and a little bit indignant that it won’t go away by his barking at it. He is also trying to maintain some dignity at the same time by being very regal looking when he is not barking. He does that by taking on photogenic poses at my feet. Each time it thunders, he looks at me and barks again and I am sure he wonders why i am not getting upset. We were supposed to go for his walk just now, but it is raining, so I suppose we will patiently wait for that to pass also. I’m having a heck of a job calming this dog down, because some of these thunder strikes are mighty loud.

The Uberhund and I went to the vet this afternoon. It was time to get a new supply of his pills for his osteoarthritis. I let him off the leash in the examination room so the vet could see how well he moves around. That medicine really helps him.

He also got weighed and he had lost a whole kilo and a half of which I am mighty proud, because I do have him on a strict diet. I measure his food and know exactly how much he eats every day.

The growth on his toe is now nothing to worry about. It has turned a pale pink and it will either stay that way or shrivel up, but it will not grow any more and it isn’t bothering him any more either. If he is licking it, he is doing it secretly without me knowing about it, but it doesn’t seem to be itching him anymore.

The Uberhund is always so relieved when he gets to leave there. He doesn’t know how fast to get out of the front door and the vet is such a nice guy too.

Oh, the storm is over. I must take the opportunity to walk the Uberhund…

So, we made it back in one piece, the thunder storm has moved to the north east of us and is rumbling at a distance. It was nice and cool out there after having been so warm. Our street gets especially hot as it it at the wrong angle to catch the wind that usually blows from the west.

The Exfactor was over this morning to finish packing up things in the workroom. This left me with having to tackle my own shelf system on which there were a lot of things that I had not looked at for years. I took a bit of a nostalgic trip through some of my less impressive years. Some things I threw away, but I discovered a bunch of art materials and diaries and I found better boxes to put those in. I have organized things so I can get at them and they are no longer hidden away.

The Exfactor and I traded bookcases and I get a set of white long low ones for two tall wood colored one. I don’t need all the space of the tall ones and like the white ones better. The workroom is going to be a spare bedroom when i get done with it. I just need to get a spare bed. I’ve got all the bedlinen to go with it. The walls need new wallpaper, but I don’t know if I’m quite up to that job yet. Well, I won’t be running a bed and breakfast.

There is one crate of photographs I need to look through and I am kind of putting it off. Photographs are always tricky things in that they brings back a variety of memories and I don’t know if I am ready for them yet. I may leave that job for a later time or do it with someone else there. My sister, for example.

It’s official now. My sister is divorcing and it turned out that her husband was having an affair since December. My sister is taking it as well as can be expected, but she can be a tough broad too and she is holding together well. Now all three of us sisters are going to be without husbands and my older sister says we should go in business together. Open up a shop annex café. We could sell our own very good cappuccinos and chocolate brownies. I wonder if she means those very special brownies?

All of us are planning on staying single, not because we are ugly broads, but because our hearts aren’t in it. It will be very interesting to see which one of us will have the first date. I think it will be my younger sister, because I am not open to dating and I think she is. We’ll see. I’m the greater cynic I think. My older sister is an even greater cynic than I am, but I think her heart could easily be broken if she were to let down her guard.

Done with that analysis. I shouldn’t discuss other people on my blog.

Every evening I forget to watch the 6 o’clock news and I sleep through the 8 o’clock news. Tonight I am going to try and stay up for it. It’s ridiculous that a grown up woman falls asleep watching the 8 o’clock news. Too many tranquilizers, that’s why I’ve cut the extra one for tonight out and I’ll see if I can stay awake better. I can’t be asleep while crucial things happen around the world, like in Zimbabwe for instance.

I think I am going to finish cleaning the kitchen cupboards now. That sounds like a fun thing to do. I can have a little toss out at the same time. Rid myself of rubbish, that’s always cleansing to the soul.

Hope you are all having a good day and a pleasant evening, think of me while you do whatever it is you are doing and send a good thought to me. I’ll see if I can catch it with my butterfly net.

Ciao…

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What the heck?

What have I gone and done now? Well, I was very casually vacuuming the living room and thinking about my ex reading my web log and how it was really not good to put that daily temptation in front of him like a very sweet desert in front of a fat person who is dieting. I mean, who wouldn’t want to know what kind of thoughts are going on inside the head of his soon to be ex wife, wouldn’t you be awfully curious? So, I thought, enough of that, you do not tie the cat to the bacon, as they say here. I must remove the temptation for him to read, although I kindly suggested this morning that he stop reading the blog.

It is too much temptation and I wouldn’t be able to stop either. So, the next best thing was to move the blog to a to him undisclosed location and hope that he doesn’t figure out where I am now by being so god darn smart. If I were him, I wouldn’t make the effort and let it go. I hope he is smart enough to do that. I also don’t want his paramount to start reading the blog. Yes, I wrote paramount and not paramour on purpose. Paramount means: commanding, controlling, dominating, dominative, governing, preponderant, regnant, reigning, ruling and I really have no idea if the poor woman is anything like that at all, but I liked it better than calling her a paramour which means: A person’s regular sexual partner.

What name shall I cal my ex? He is sort of a dominant person himself and preponderant and commanding, so I should come up with a good name that has that meaning in it too. No, I’ll just call them the Exfactor and the Paramount. The He and the She. I don’t have that many unkind thoughts about them, but I wish to be a little bit of mean about them sometimes, to get some of the frustrations out occasionally that I will never show in public. In public I will be a most reasonable woman who will not show the back of her tongue and who will always be kind and polite and who could Hillary Clinton look like she needs charm lessons.

I have had a most pleasant day so far, except that I asked the Exfactor to do me a favor and in his discombobulated mind he got things all screwed up and it took several phone calls to get it somewhat straightened out. At least to the point that it will hopefully be satisfactory to the people of the Social Services whom I will see on Tuesday. I should have taken care of this myself, but instead depended on the Exfactor’s stamina on his bike and his reasonable intelligence. I must remember not to do this anymore and depend on myself to take care of delicate matters, as it seems that our minds work differently. It must be the Venus/Mars thing. I will just have to try harder on my bike and not be intimidated by long distances and wind that blows straight at you.

Anyway, I vacuumed the apartment and polished the furniture and picked out a slipcover that my daughter had offered to buy for me as a housewarming gift for the new chair. I suppose I should have a housewarming party, but I think I am just going to wait until my birthday in September and invite a bunch of people over then. Hopefully, I will get very good gifts. I will start dropping very heavy hints soon. You can’t start soon enough with those things.

I filled two glass containers with different teas and one with pasta that I don’t eat, but it looks good. I have one empty glass container left for I don’t know what, so if anybody has an idea. It is airtight.

I went grocery shopping and spent 22 Euros and that should last me for the week and then I’ll have to get a few things for the weekend. Aren’t I a cheap woman? I even got very nice treats for the dog. I have to call him the dog now so he won’t be recognized by name. The Dog. The Uberhund! I bought some new cat kibbles that are a good brand, but just a bit cheaper and the cats like them very much. I always put down two bowls for three cats and one bowl is empty and the other is nearly so. Those troopers! They know we’re on a budget.

But guess what I just saw happen. The Uberhund was eating cat food! Aha! He ate all of it. Well, you know what that means. The cat food needs to be moved to the counter. That stinker, he has never done that before. I actually find it very funny, because Toby was convincing himself the other day that he liked the dog food. Well, now my wooden shoe breaks.

The Uberhund must think he has died and gone to dog heaven with all those dishes of good food and the snacks. I am trying to keep him on a diet so he doesn’t gain anymore weight, this will defeat all my efforts.

When you live by yourself, you have no dishes to wash, at least I don’t. I don’t cook for my self and eat simple food that is easy to fix. I have at the most a glass and a mug and a knife and a small plate. I rinse everything off right away. I never use the stove and I heat milk in the microwave. Milk with honey before I go to sleep.

Okay, that’s the end of the introductory epistle to this new blog. I’ve got some things left to do to it. Hope you are all going to have a great day. Oh goodness, it is Friday. remember how that used to be my favorite time of the week? Well, I have other days that are now, depending on what happens on them. I do like Saturday a lot now.

Ciao…

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Really!?

Eduard has asked me not to write about him anymore unless it is in a businesslike way and he has asked me not to write about Lieve at all and especially not by her name. From now on I will refer to Eduard as Ed and Lieve as Lovey and I have suggested to Ed that he stops reading my blog. It’s a two edged sword, reading the blog of your ex wife. Enough said about that. Gggrrrhhh…

Being up early is the exception that proves the rule. I went to bed on time because I was just worn out, but I just woke up in the middle of the night all wide awake and ready to get up and have a coffee and a cigarette and maybe write a post.

Anyway, yesterday afternoon Ed and I went to my bank were he was taken off my bank account and my name was changed back to my maiden name. I also changed the account to an Internet bank account and automatically had a savings account attached to it, which is kind of neat, because i wanted that anyway. When I left the bank, the woman who had helped me shook my hand and said, “Goodbye Mrs S**ders,” which I truly appreciated, being addressed by my own name.

Even when I am home, I am filling out forms or on the telephone making calls to get things organized, but I think today will be a fairly calm day, because Ed has been so kind as to offer to go all the way to the housing corporation to pick up the rental contract for this apartment for me, which I need next week for my appointment with Social Services. The housing corporation is a long bike ride away from here and I really didn’t feel like making it and asked him to do me the favor. I have however been riding my bike an awful lot and have lost a couple of kilos these past weeks. Of course, I haven’t been eating that much either, what with my gastric band having been tightened and I subsist on a small amount of food.

Yesterday afternoon I was supposed to meet Ed at his work, but they were in a meeting there and I walked over to Café Monopole and had a glass of dry white wine on the terrace all by myself and it was very cozy. I watched the people walk by and watched the people watch me. Then I went over to M&S Fashion and bought a top on sale for 9 Euros. See, I do know how to amuse myself. Oh, that reminds me, I have to do my tiny little bit of shopping at the grocery store today. It’s so funny, the small amount of food I have to buy, even when you include the food for the animals.

I just got completely distracted making a shopping list and then I started to organize the kitchen shelves, but I see I need to do a proper cleaning and I better finish this post first, but it is funny that I can clean up the kitchen at 3:30 in the morning and not bother anyone. It’s amazing the things I can do at any time of the day, but especially during the small hours of the night. Those are the neatest hours.

Well, now I am going to end this post, because there are some glass jars that need a good cleaning and that need to be filled with some interesting things, such as different teas. Oh, such fun!

Have an absolutely smashing day and make sure you get enough sleep. not like me here who has a screwy schedule.

Ciao…

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